Archive for the ‘Ridiculous’ Category

What if all advertising was negative like political ads?

January 23, 2012 Leave a comment

I live in Florida, where the upcoming presidential primary next week has our media jammed with political commercials. I got to thinking this morning: “What if all advertising was negative like political ads?”

Maybe something like this:

> Duracell was caught red-handed making batteries, and battery acid is used to make methamphetamine, and methamphetamine is very, very bad. Choose Energizer Batteries: “It keeps going and going and going.”

> FACT: American Airlines provided 50% of the jets used by terrorists on 9/11 to carry out the deadliest terror strike in U.S. history. “Fly the friendly skies of United.”

> In 2004, the film documentary Super Size Me revealed that eating at McDonalds causes you to gain 24.5 pounds in one month. Trust the Creepy King and “Have it your way.”

> According to experts at the Mayo Clinic, alcohol – just like the kind found in Heineken – depresses the nerves that control involuntary actions such as breathing, heartbeat and your gag reflex, which keeps you from choking. Drinking too much alcohol can slow and, in some cases, shut down these functions. “Guinness is good for you.”

> MasterCard spends millions to make Americans grin with its “Priceless” ads, but they’re only telling you half of the story. Consumer debt in the U.S. topped $11.4 trillion in 2011, and 98% of revolving debt is on credit cards. Just like the ones in the Priceless ads. We don’t think that’s something to grin about. “VISA – It’s everywhere you want to be.”